Recently I have been going through a darkness in my life. Summer-you were on another level today, talking about how God sometimes answers prayers in a way that doesn’t make sense to us. Part of the reason for my struggle (I learned thru my spiritual counselor via Holy Wisdom Monestary) is that my inner child is crying out to me not to be abandoned. As with most families, I have had to accept the things I did and did not receive. I’ve been praying that God bring me more close to him directly, to fill my heart and this emptiness. As a person in recovery, the first three steps are the most important-accepting I am powerless, coming to believe and praying only for HIs will to be done…at 71 years old, my parents continue to seek counseling to help me heal. They have surrounded me with love and support in this time and what I have learned is that God doesn’t need to draw me near because He has been here all along. I’m am slowly learning how to show up for the girl-child that so desperately just wants to be loved-learning how to be my own best friend. My mental health team is growing exponentially, even in the time of COVID. Although it feels false to always shift to gratitude instead of my true feelings, I feel grateful for the pain calling out to me and calling me back to myself and therefore God. Thank you for your worship and testimony, Summer. It’s reminding me to be less self-centered in the kindest way. Keep up the good work!

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